Success is not just a function of the quality of the decision you make, but also of the efficiency with which you implement it.
So, to be successful and happy, “How should we handle change and the problems it generates effectively without the negative repercussions of unhealthy stress?”
We need to work together, as one unit which complements and does not compete with the other. We have a natural attraction for people who are a little different from us and fill in our gaps. To put it better, we are drawn to people who are not like us. Maybe that is why our introductions are, ‘My better half, my significant other!’
Marriage or any committed relationship is a complementary relationship. We fall in love with the strengths our partner shows in areas where we are ineffectual…We are each other’s better half and together we are better off!
In a marriage we collaborate and take mutually agreeable decisions. What we need is not only collaboration in decision making, but also co-operation in implementation. To cooperate, there needs to be a common interest… and it all depends upon whether we respect and trust each other or not.
In new relationships, we do a few things half-heartedly. In love adjusting, acceding to the loved one feels natural. But with time the newness wears off, and adjustment by one party makes adjusting a little more difficult every time we try to be understanding. With mutual respect and trust, things are explained, made to understand and both the parties walk some way and meet in the middle. Neither yields totally and nor do they completely get only their way actioned. We have an attitude of learning from one another.
Another interesting term Dr. Adizes explains is, “Give and take”. Every relationship has give and take. If there is mutual trust and respect, there is collaboration in decision making and cooperation in implementation.
Though relationships have give and take, unfortunately, love does not function only on give and take. But both, relationships and love survive and thrive on trust and respect. We are willing to invest in a relationship we trust and respect.
Love is not sustainable if there is no mutual trust and respect. Love is where in the giving is the taking.
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