To feel, you have to stop listening. Stop trying to understand and just FEEL. We know a lot but understand very little.
I had to reread the line, “We know a lot but understand very little.” This is so true for all of us. With omniscient google, there is nothing we don’t know for long! Any questions about anything, the google can easily bring it to our awareness. Yet, with all that we know, how much do we understand? We are still in the dark as far as the implications and ramifications of all our knowledge and google awareness go. Too much awareness is robbing us of our emotions. We process everything rationally and logically with a sense of fair/ unfair and form our own opinions and judgements.
In this overplay of words and intellectual fight, emotions are suppressed. At moments of hurt and anguish, words only interfere with our need to feel and be felt. …Resulting in emotional vacuum. When a person is in pain and the significant other is helping assuage the situation with words, it may not be helpful, and worse it may even aggravate the situation. For, Logical issues should be handled with logic, and feelings should be handled with feelings.
Speaking could ruin the moment. Feelings come from the heart and, yes, there is and there can be heart to heart communion. The mind speaks with words; the heart with feeling transmitted in silence.
In the heat of the moment, if the other person listens whole heartedly, in absolute silence, the tension will undoubtedly dissolve. And then the presenting concern can be addressed in a logical way. Ones the emotions are understood; the pacified, rational mind can step in and process with a changed perspective.
What hurts people, is not what happens to them but what it means to them!
And a few compassionate moments of silent hearing are all it usually takes for the pain to go away. Only after the pain eases can a balm heal the wound. Similarly, words have the power to weave their magic, be the balm, after the silent, empathic hearing.
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