Dr. Carol says how people cope with failure speaks volumes about their personality and mindset.
As part of research, a difficult puzzle was offered to 10year olds, their response to the changing level of difficulty surprised Dr. Carol. Some children got excited when they were not able to solve the puzzle and wanted to continue to try and accept harder challenges! Whereas some children did not want to venture at all after the first round of success. They were reluctant to accept a difficult challenge and risk a failure. Instead, they did not mind doing the same puzzle in lesser time, more smartly and more perfectly!
She defined these mind sets as, growth and fixed mindsets. And the view you adopt for yourself profoundly affects the way you lead your life. It can determine whether you become the person you want to be and whether you accomplish the things you value.
Believing that your qualities are carved in stone- the fixed mindset-creates an urgency to prove yourself over and over. If you have only a certain amount of intelligence, a certain personality, and a certain moral character - well, then you’d better prove that you have a healthy dose of them. It simply wouldn’t do to look or feel deficient in these most basic characteristics.
The growth mindset is based on the belief that your basic qualities are things you can cultivate through your efforts, your strategies and help from others. Although people may differ in every way - in their initial talents and aptitudes, interests, or temperaments – everyone can change and grow through application and experience.
The growth mindset resonates with what my Master says. When asked about how to curb one’s ego or manage anger, His answer is, “Use ego to be proud of your accomplishments, by becoming a little better than yesterday! And be as angry as you want with yourself, because anger is the best mirror, revealing what really matters to you!”
In a fixed mindset, I am already full of myself, and my anger will be directed at how unfair the world is. It never is my fault, because I am already the epitome of perfection!
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