Making new year resolutions and forgetting them before the end of January has been the bane of my existence. The only habit which I have successful imbibed and made a part of my daily life is meditation. Every other habit, walking, music, writing, website, yoga and a few others, have slipped by me. With a resolute intent I start, and I have restarted for the last many years, unsuccessfully.
I thank my sister for suggesting that I read Atomic Habits. I picked it up skeptically as this was not my first book on developing habits. None of them had a lasting impact and I doubted the miraculous efficacy of this book too.
Much to my surprise though, this book did make a difference. I am practicing most of the habits I promised myself. That is the reason I want to share this book with the readers😊
James Clear starts the book with a unique question which piqued my curiosity. He asks the readers, “What is your identity?” Because your identity emerges out of your habits! I had never thought of it that way!
The second interesting comment was, ‘Don’t focus on the goals, goals restrict your happiness’! This was a bigger surprise, as every book I had read in the past started with, ‘Set your goal, where do you see yourself in 10 years from now’. Here he was asking me not to focus on the goal. He writes, “Goal setting suffers from a serious case of survivorship bias …. Achieving a goal only changes your life for the moment. That’s the counterintuitive thing about improvement. We think we need to change our results, but the results are not the problem. What we really need to change are the systems that cause those results.”
Once the goal is achieved you have no further motivation, or if the goal is not achieved then you are demotivated. His suggestion is to focus on the system, the process we would like to adapt to reach the goal. Habits, good or bad have a funny way of glueing on to the person. The outcome is because of what we are doing, and so he wants us to keep our focus on the processes, and the outcomes take care of themselves.
Even a simple shift in statements like “I am trying to lose weight” changed with conviction to, ‘I have lost weight’ helps us. The attitude to get to that outcome is more willing and joyful. The underlying belief changes and with the change in our belief our habits change in shaping our new identity. Because your identity emerges out of your habits!
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